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| A Step Outside of Normal |
I'm
plagued with a sense of greatness. I've always known that I'm
destined to be different, to excel where others fail, to reach
heights that others couldn't even imagine. I've known it since I was
young. I am great. I will shake the world.
My
plague.
A
plague because I'm 30 years old and it's not happening yet. Hasn't
happened at all. In fact, quite the opposite. I look around and
feel that all my striving and effort has landed me squarely on the
side of mediocrity. I don't have the life I dreamed of. My life
looks less like a dream and more like a series of disconnected,
unplanned events that have little in common except for the fact that
I star in all of them and they all end up rather lackluster.
I'm
plagued by an undeveloped potential. A haunting of a what might have
been. A whisper that all the dreams and ambitions I had were mine
for the taking but that somehow, in some way that I can't quite see
because I'm too much of a blind dimwit, I squandered the opportunity.
There's also another, equally insistent whisper that I was meant for
so much more than what I have now.
Plagued.
Haunted by failure.
Was
the dream true? Was there ever any potential in me? Did I have it
in me to shake the world with my footsteps? Am I destined to forever
wonder if it was all just a dream? Or was it real but I somehow lost
my way and fumbled the destiny I was supposed to have?
These
questions have been haunting me. Swirling around in my head like
cloudy water in a jar. Was it true? Or was I destined to die in
obscurity from the beginning?
I'm
tired of trying to figure it out. The questions are driving me mad.
I have to find out. I have to answer this burning question: Is
there still a chance? Do I still have time to find the destiny I
sensed when I was young, or do I resign myself to a lifetime of
mediocrity?
What
will it take to find out? How can I discover or rediscover a
purpose? What steps should I take? I've developed so many habits in
my life that I don't even know what it takes to do something
differently. Is it possible to change? Can my life be fulfilling
and full of purpose?
This
will be my journey. A journey to break out of complacency. A
challenge to rise above the status quo. This will be a chronicling
of the efforts that the undertaking will require. A blog, a
traveler’s notes on the paths I choose, the steps I take, the
pitfalls I encounter, and the victories I (hopefully) achieve.
God,
I hope I achieve something wonderful.
I
will step outside of normal. I will share the journey with you. I
will be brutally honest. I will shatter the limits of the possible,
or I will fail spectacularly. I will no longer wonder the
middle-ground shadow lands of safety and boredom. I want to see if
there is life, real life, to be had out there. I will see if
greatness is possible – even accessible.
If
it is? Well, then we can go there – together.
It is with a lot of excitement that I announce the launching of my new website, www.stepoutsideofnormal.com, where the journey will continue. This blog will become less active - in fact, I won't update it anymore, but you can get all my updates over at my new, dedicated website. Once again, that's:
I'll see you there!
